Thursday, November 18, 2010

More posts about animals and food

So it's that time of year when my Entourage and Toshi gather to challenge one another to consume bizarre food combinations in a time-honored ritual of male bonding and an attempt to curry my favor (although how that's supposed to work I'm still not sure). The only rule is that the items eaten have to be actual foodstuffs; no fair slipping in worms or KY Jelly or glass shards or sauteed Fio (and don't think they haven't tried). Frankly, I'm not sure who won this year's Ultimate Gross Food Combination Consumption Entourage Smackdown, because they're all passed out from puking. But here's a list of what was featured in this year's Smackdown, albeit alphabetically and not consumptively ordered:

-- Asparagus topped with grape jelly, Orange Julius, and chili powder
-- Candy corn sauteed in garlic, smothered in BBQ sauce and topped with fresh dill and mayonnaise
-- Clam chowder with maple syrup
-- Cheese Whiz
-- Cornflakes with catsup
-- Fudge & oyster milkshake
-- Graham cracker, pate & sauerkraut S'Mores
-- Liver merangue pie
-- Okra and tapioca pudding topped with shredded kidney beans
-- Soy pumpkin latte flavored with shredded tuna (dolphin-free)
-- Spice cake slathered with chicken lard and topped with an olive

Me, I was having none of this. Instead I perused eBay, as is my wont when bored. I think I finally have succeeded in finding the most random American Girl eBay listing ever:



OMG WTF I don't even... I know it says it's a lion, but it's more likely a banana overcompensating for its owner's penility by wearing a bad hairpiece. I don't really get how that works psychologically, but the evidence is clear.