Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Pressing the Flesh

I've been on the campaign trail the last few days. Jiggy said I need to get out there to press the flesh and coochy-coo some babies. Personally, I think this photo illustrates a better use of baby flesh, but I realize that I am probably in the minority on this issue:

What, you find that offensive? Get over it. People take their dolls way too seriously.

Think about it from my perspective. Would you like to have grubby hands pawing at you, getting strained carrots in your bandana and sticky drool all over your vinyl? Wait, I think I've just described your sex life, haven't I? No wonder you're so sensitive and uptight.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Can't Keep a Secret

Damn it.
I was waiting to announce the news about my campaign at just the right moment, since the element of surprise is so important at times like this. But those snooping, scooping fools at Playthings blew my cover. Damn them. Damn them all.
Jiggy says not to worry about it. The first round of campaign buttons went out last week, so it isn't like I could keep it a secret for much longer.
Speaking of the buttons, hey, I like them a lot. At first I worried that I looked too jowly, but then I remembered that I'm above such petty vanity.
The members over at Playthings want campaign tshirts. Yeah, right. I am made of vinyl and muslin, not money. They think I get paid to be a mod at Playthings? The hell. This is a low budget campaign; go make your own freaking tshirts, people. Personally, I think only Jess dolls should be allowed to wear them, but Jiggy said that's no way to think if I want to win.
Speaking of Jiggy, he's been a tad on the bossy side lately, since he assumed the mantle of my campaign manager. I have to watch him like a hawk. While he was supportive of my rehab, he is still tipping the bottle himself and playing the horses. One of the Playthings members said the button she received included a request for whiskey. Jiggy slipped that in, the fool. I don't know, maybe he isn't The One. I've been eyeing up those Carpatina boys lately. Mmm, mmm, mmm. All nice hard vinyl. Yeah.